Stand by Your Man Part 2 

Facts and Figures…

Our most recent performance has highlighted a very prevalent issue, although how prevalent we may never know. We will probably never know how many people are currently living in fear of their partner, in both straight and LGBT relationships. Male and female perpetrators, physical and emotional abuse, male and female victims afraid to leave because they may provoke an outburst of violence. 

Would we really know what we would do or how we would react if it were to happen to us? I mean we can talk a big game when watching incidents of domestic violence in plays on TV or even reading books … Telling ourselves that we would never let that happen to us. But would we really be that brave? Would we be able to actually stand up, fight back and walk out? 

Before I start to bore you all with the facts and figures my research has uncovered … I wanted to mention that I find that when I start to get involved in a particular subject I’m always confronted by it in some form.

A few weeks ago when we were just getting settled and Josh hadn’t long joined us making us a full ensemble I was met with an incident of domestic abuse. Now I must make a confession – I’m not the most tolerant person on the bus while I’m reading and have forgotten my headphones … I do not like noise that distracts me from my escapism. However, this day I was distracted by a young girl rushing past me and sitting behind me while sobbing audibly. 

I was relatively annoyed until I heard her speak: 

She was arguing over her hands free with what I can assume was her partner … She was sobbing throughout as she argued saying: Stop phoning me, I’m going to work, you know I’m going to work and that I work in Cardiff … Stop phoning me, this is harassment. She went on to continue pleading for him to stop contacting her, she then cried out really upset: You have just threatened to have me kicked out of my home … Are you serious? I’m going to the police about this.

Now as I had been researching domestic violence I felt I should reach out and I gave her Reality Theatre’s information for if she needed it. She hasn’t contacted me and I haven’t seen her since but perhaps just the reaching out helped – showing that she isn’t alone. After all that can be the only thing needed for someone to make the step…

While researching this issue I was surprised at some of the figures that I found … It makes me want to speak out about this issue. Perhaps, I can help somewhere but for now I’m going to post some information that I found… 

  • Domestic Violence accounts for 16% of all violent crime 
  • Domestic Violence accounts for an estimated 2 million victims a year
  • 2001/02 British Crime Survey: 635,000 incidents of Domestic Violence in England and Wales
  • British Crime Survey – 81% of victims were women… 19% of victims were men
  • Domestic Violence has a higher rate of repeat victimisation than any other crime 
  • 85% of women who leave an abusive relationship return to their abusive partners 
  • 8% of women will suffer Domestic Violence in any given Year
  • 1 in 4 women in England and Wales experience Domestic Violence in their lifetimes 
  • On average a woman is assaulted 35 times before her first call to the police
  • A woman will leave an abusive relationship 7 times before leaving for good
  • 40-70% of women reported abuse from a partner or from within the family
  • 2 women are killed every week in England and Wales by a current/former partner
  • Approximately, 100 women and 30 men are murdered per year 

  • Male victims: Over twice as likely not to report Domestic Abuse 
  • 10% will inform the police about abuse
  • 23% will tell a person in an official position
  • 11% will tell a health professional 
  • The number of female perpetrators has more than quadrupled in the last 10 years – 806 in 2004/05 … 4,866 in 2014/15 

  • Sigma Survey – 1 in 4 individuals in a same sex relationship experience domestic abuse at some time 
  • 49% of all Gay and Bisexual men have experienced at least 1 incident of Domestic Abuse
  • 1 in 4 Lesbians and Bisexual women have experienced Domestic Violence – 2/3 Abusers are Women and 1/3 Abusers are Men
  • 80% of Transgender people have experienced emotional, sexual or physical abuse 

A new initiative is coming into play as of April 2016 and it will challenge perpetrators to change their behaviours… If the behaviour changes then there is less chance of repeat victimisation!! 


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